In simple terms, emotional maturity refers to a person’s ability to manage and understand their emotions, regardless of the circumstances. There are clear signs that show you are an emotionally mature person.
Those persons who have reached emotional maturity – or are in the process of achieving it – have acquired a level of self-understanding and self-control that allows them to cope with challenging situations and make timely decisions successfully.
However, we must keep in mind that reaching emotional maturity is a gradual and ongoing process, not something that happens overnight and remains static. As long as we live, we evolve and learn from experiences. It is also essential to understand that reaching emotional maturity doesn’t mean we will always act impeccably. It is not unusual to lose composure when dealing with a particularly challenging situation.
Unsure whether you are emotionally mature? Below you can find 35 signs that clearly show that – if you haven’t already reached emotional maturity – you are on the right track.
35 Signs You Are Emotionally Mature
1. You have an action-oriented outlook on life
Instead of complaining and blaming other people, the circumstances, or even yourself, you start looking for solutions and take action each time things get complicated.
2. You take responsibility for your mistakes
We all make mistakes. That’s a fact. An emotionally mature person doesn’t look for excuses, admit their mistake, apologizes, and tries to correct it.
3. You show empathy
Emotionally mature people can put themselves in other people’s shoes and do their best to help and support them.
4. You are not afraid of your own vulnerability
Being emotionally mature implies accepting your imperfections and weaknesses. An emotionally mature person is not afraid to talk openly about their own emotions and struggles.
5. You don’t hold grudges
Emotionally mature people know that life is too short to waste time and energy hating or to get revenge on those who did us wrong. Being able to forgive is a sign of emotional maturity.
6. You don’t let emotions overrule rationality
Even emotionally mature people can occasionally get mad or excited. However, they won’t let emotions take control of the way they deal with the situation. Having a clear mind before taking action allows us to get a more accurate view of the situation and ponder all the available options.
7. You are not judgmental of other people
Emotionally mature people won’t judge a book by its cover. Instead, they will show empathy and genuinely work toward knowing a person’s ‘truth’ before voicing an opinion.
8. You take every opportunity to learn and grow as a person
Emotionally mature people will take every opportunity to learn and grow. Learning from other people and on-the-spot situations will help us enrich our knowledge and benefit from other people’s wisdom.
9. You are flexible
Things don’t always go according to plan. Emotionally mature people can assess any unexpected obstacle and work toward finding a viable solution. Instead of getting frustrated or upset, an emotionally mature person strives to make the best of what they have.
10. You are not afraid to ask for help
Despite what many people wrongly believe, asking for help when necessary is not a sign of weakness. On the contrary, it is a sign of responsibility, courage, self-awareness, and self-confidence. Emotionally mature people won’t hesitate to ask for help.
11. When emotions overwhelm you, you resort to healthy strategies to control them
Some situations give birth to powerful – sometimes overwhelming – emotions. That is absolutely normal. Emotionally mature people resort to healthy strategies that can help them get back on the right track: ask help from a counselor, talk about it with people they trust, meditate, etc.
12. You know you can’t control other people’s emotions
The way we feel about a particular situation is – basically – a personal choice. Nobody can force us to feel happy, sad, or disgusted. In the same way, you are the master of your own emotions; it is up to other people to control theirs. An emotionally mature person won’t feel responsible for other people’s inability to control their emotions.
13. You don’t only know how to say sorry, but you are also able to accept an apology
An emotionally mature person can accept an apology and close the conflict for good without bringing it into discussion each time a new conflict arises.
14. You can deal with uncomfortable emotions such as guilt or shame
An emotionally mature person will take full responsibility for their emotions and actions, even if they triggered unpleasant or inappropriate outcomes. An emotionally mature person will learn from these mistakes and adapt to the consequences.
15. You work toward achieving emotional maturity
Emotional maturity implies not only self-knowledge but also self-control and education. Reaching emotional maturity goes hand in hand with each person’s ability to fully understand how their emotions work and becoming aware of the reactions they trigger.
16. You don’t avoid emotional discomfort
When something upsets them, some people resort to distractions – such as compulsive shopping, drinking, smoking, etc. – to avoid dealing with their emotions. An emotionally mature person will show tolerance toward these feelings and will strive to deal with them successfully.
17. You know Perfection is nothing but a myth
An emotionally mature person knows their imperfections better than anyone. Like everyone else, one of the signs you are an emotionally mature person is knowing you make mistakes and learn from them, engaging in a lifelong improvement journey.
18. You value all the little things life gifts you
The Covid-19 pandemic has reminded us all that it doesn’t take much to feel happy. An emotionally mature person appreciates a walk in the park or a friend’s smile to their true value. Emotionally mature people won’t let themselves be overwhelmed by adversity and can cultivate positivity and genuine happiness.
19. You work toward improving your flaws
We have already mentioned that emotionally mature people are well aware of their flaws. But they also understand that other people are not obliged to tolerate them. An emotionally mature person will not only admit and accept these flaws, but they will also work toward correcting them.
20. You have realistic expectations when it comes to relationships
Instead of letting themselves blindly dragged into ‘love at first sight’ – often based solely on physical attraction – relationships, emotionally mature people dedicate time and effort to getting to know the other person in-depth before they get emotionally involved.
21. You are resilient
Life is made of ups and downs. It is normal to feel upset and disappointed when confronted with a drawback. However, emotionally mature people can experience their emotions, control them, respond to them with a calm and clear mind, and move on.
22. You make humor and laughter part of your life
Of course, important things require seriousness. But banning laughter and humor out of your life does nothing but enhance stress and pressure. Being able to enjoy a good laugh – be it with your family or friends or when watching your favorite TV comedy show – will allow you to detach yourself from problems, release stress, and come back to serious matters with a clear mind and a fresh outlook.
23. You are not afraid to utter the phrase ‘I don’t know’
An emotionally mature person is not afraid to admit that they don’t answer all the questions. And there is nothing wrong with it!
24. You feel comfortable being yourself
An emotionally mature person will not only accept and value all the things that define them as a person, but they can appreciate others for who they are. What’s more, emotionally mature people understand that self-growth is a continuous process.
25. You value actions above words
Many people have the ability to say the right words at the right time. But being emotionally mature implies much more. An emotionally mature person understands that actions are worth much more than words, even requiring time and effort. An emotionally mature person will stand by the side of their beloved ones through good and – above all – bad.
26. You are true to your own dreams and expectations
Sometimes, we build our lives based on what other people expect from us. An emotionally mature person will try to be true to their essence and finds intrinsic motivation for making life choices and thus reach happiness and fulfilment.
27. You find happiness and fulfilment when helping other people
“There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people,” used to say, John Holmes. Being able to find joy in helping other people is a clear sign of emotional maturity.
28. You can make compromises to make a relationship work
An emotionally mature person doesn’t see compromise as a sign of weakness but as maturity and strength. Even if there is true love, relationships are not problem-proof. Sometimes, making a relationship work implies making compromises.
29. You are not afraid to leave your guard down to find love
An emotionally mature person knows that rejection and breakups can become part of the equation when it comes to love. Keeping present that you will get back on your feet even if things don’t go the way you want them to is a sign of emotional maturity. An emotionally mature person will be able to handle negative, intense emotions healthily and constructively.
30. You know when to give up and when to persevere
Some battles are just not worth fighting. However, investing time, energy, and emotions in a meaningless action to ‘have it your way’ is a clear sign of emotional immaturity.
31. You can adapt to any circumstance
Emotionally immature people are egocentric and expect others to adapt to them. In exchange, emotionally mature people can adapt to any situation and go with it!
32. You are open to accepting other people’s views and opinions
An emotionally mature person knows that life is not solely black and white. There are many shades of grey. Being open to listening to other people and accepting what they propose if beneficial to the cause is a sign of emotional maturity.
33. You respect other people’s beliefs and lines of thinking even if you disagree
Going through life with an open mind and willingness to at least respect – if not fully understand and accept – other people’s beliefs, opinions, or habits is a sign of emotional maturity.
34. You know that your health always comes first
An emotionally mature person will know when to take a break and focus on their own wellness. Conversely, it is almost impossible for a person who works incessantly and neglects their own physical, emotional, and mental health to experience true happiness and fulfillment.
35. You show compassion to other and – above all – to yourself
It’s already clear that we all make mistakes. Holding onto negative emotions – guilt, frustration, or anger – makes it impossible to move on. Emotionally mature people can forgive those who wrong them and forgive themselves and separate the positive emotions from the destructive ones.
We hope you find our list of signs you are an emotionally mature person valuable source for selfreflection. If so, share the discovery with your friends, and for more valuable insights, take a look at other articles.